Prepared?

This is an embarrassing story, but I think it needs to be told. Today was our Stake Conference. We knew it was the conference, and we were prepared to attend. We were excited, set the alarm, and thought we were ready. However, as we woke up and we started getting ready, we realized that we did not know which church building (the building, address, or even Stake name) we were supposed to attend! Could we call someone? No, the few numbers that we have were for members who would most likely be in meetings. Could we look online? We could if we knew how to use that particular feature on the LDS.org site. Could we just drive around and magically find it? This is not Utah, so our chances of randomly running into the correct building on time would be low... So much for being "prepared" for the conference!

This got me thinking and it made me wonder all of the things that we could have done differently. Our wonderful Bishop was here on Tuesday, and I had my amazing Visiting Teacher here on Wednesday. Couldn't I have asked one of them? We have two sets of neighbors who are also in our Ward, couldn't we have talked to them? Why did we wait for the last minute to get our information? We had falsely allowed ourselves to believe we were prepared when we were not prepared at all. What other things do we incorrectly believe we are prepared for?

The whole situation made me think of the parable of the virgins, in Matthew 25:


 ¹ “Then the kingdom of heaven shall be likened to ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom. ² Now five of them were wise, and five were foolish. ³ Those who were foolish took their lamps and took no oil with them, ⁴ but the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps. ⁵But while the bridegroom was delayed, they all slumbered and slept.
⁶ “And at midnight a cry was heard: ‘Behold, the bridegroom is coming;^[a] go out to meet him!’ ⁷ Then all those virgins arose and trimmed their lamps. ⁸ And the foolish said to the wise, ‘Give us some of your oil, for our lamps are going out.’ ⁹ But the wise answered, saying, ‘No, lest there should not be enough for us and you; but go rather to those who sell, and buy for yourselves.’ ¹⁰ And while they went to buy, the bridegroom came, and those who were ready went in with him to the wedding; and the door was shut. 
¹¹ “Afterward the other virgins came also, saying, ‘Lord, Lord, open to us!’ ¹² But he answered and said, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, I do not know you.’ 
¹³ “Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour^[b] in which the Son of Man is coming.


Would I be a virgin who had thought ahead and brought her oil? Would I be a virgin who remembered her lamp at all? Would I be a virgin who would be ready the moment I was called? I would love to answer yes, and before today I think I may have been able to unknowingly lie to myself and believe I would be a prepared woman, but now I see the truth: I have a lot of work to do.

As soon as we bring home our babies, we mothers have to be prepared. We have baby Tylenol, diapers, wipes, and a change of clothing (or two!) everywhere we go. As our children get older we still keep snacks in our purses and Kleenex in the car. And none of us (hopefully!) would dream of starting a long road trip without fueling the vehicles first! But as nice as these preparations are, they are purely temporal.

Each of us has things we need to plan and prepare for. I am very thankful that my hats are as a student, wife, mother, homemaker, and homeschooler- each of these roles requires preparation and forethought. For many women there are additional preparations that need to be made: family gatherings, community service, food storage and emergency preparedness, carpools, vacations, school events, church callings, employment, budgets and payments, holidays, etc. And those are just the things I can name without taking time and brainstorming! We are all very busy!!!

I have found that daily scripture study, personal prayer, and family prayer all help keep the spirituality on my list of top priorities. However, there are so many Earthly things that we have to plan and prepare for, it is often easy to allow spiritual preparation to fall on the back-burner. Like the foolish virgins, who allowed their  temporal needs to come first (they slept instead of getting their oil), it is easy to find ourselves out of time when we are put to the test. So, I hope that as I learn from today's experience, I will remember that I need to fill my lamp before it is too late- and next time I will get to where I need to be on time. Knowing that "you know neither the day nor the hour in which the Son of Man is coming," should be a very large wake up call- we need to be prepared today, right now!

How can we prepare ourselves and increase our spirituality? Make it a habit!

Start with:

• Family Prayer
• Personal Prayer
• Daily Scripture Study
• Church Attendance
• Regular Family Home Evening

I have had years of struggle with making daily scripture study a habit, and I found that joining a scripture study group really helped me (I am a Good Morning Girl, a nondenominational scripture study group). I also bought a large set of "family" scriptures that have photographs, illustrations, and definitions, and we read the family scriptures with the children. These were steps that I had to take in order to improve my performance in a very weak area of my spiritual progress. And as I have progressed in one area, I can move to another. 

This is all a journey, but if we press on joyfully, and put God first, our journey will have deeper meaning and eternal purpose. I am thankful I was able to share one of my many rough areas with you, and if you have any suggestions, ideas, or comments please feel free to share!

Latter-Day Homeschooling!?

I love the internet! Today I changed the look of my blog (for those who hate Christmas things in November, I apologize, but I greatly needed the boost in holiday spirit. Christmas may come in December, but for planning mothers it seems to come much earlier, and it happens more cheerfully if I have holiday cheer in my body!!!) and while I was looking for some cute new blog buttons I came upon a button for Latter-Day Homeschooling. What was this?! I clicked around and came to a super site that is full of homeschooling ideas, and has links to dozens of other homeschooling blogs with hundreds of more ideas! I am thrilled!

I am always looking for new blogs to read, new homeschool ideas, and new sources of inspiration! If you have any that you love please share!

A testimony.

I have been having a private struggle with something. I have only told 4 people, one of whom is my husband, about this struggle. Today, while in Church, I was able to witness a tender mercy of my very own.

Struggles are never easy- even if we are faithful. When struggles are deeply personal, and stir old feelings, they can be painful and difficult to handle. As much as I write in blogs, I am a pretty private person, and I don't generally share the pains that are closest to my heart. I do, however, reach out to friends that I feel would offer helpful insight or uplifting council during these times. During this struggle I have often turned to scriptures like, Psalm 34:19 which says, A righteous man may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers him from them all. The scriptures have brought me comfort, but could not solve my problem.

In my struggle, I reached out to a dear friend of mine, and she wisely offered comfort, and added that she would seek helpful suggestions on my behalf. She talked to me a week later, with some very wonderful ideas on how to solve my issue. Trying them, however, I was met with failure. Frustrated and in need of help, I turned to another friend- this time looking for a way to (in essence) run away from my problem. My friend offered basic truths- this was not a problem I could run from consequence free, but she offered to help me nonetheless. Feeling backed into a corner (running away was not a good option) I reached out to my third friend. This friend lives in Utah, and is very very very very very very very busy. I wrote to her, and while I waited for her response I kept searching my scriptures, journaling my innermost thoughts and feelings, and praying for help.

 A few days later I had a beautiful dream. I woke from the dream with a clear understanding of what needed to be done. However, my heart was still heavy. Just in time I received a response from my Utah friend. Her message was so beautifully and truthfully simple, and it came with a movie recommendation** (bonus!). I picked up the movie, had a home-date with Kurt, and felt much better about my decision.

Enter tender mercy (as if I hadn't already been given so many!). This Sunday I went to Church, and right after our Sacrament Meeting I was asked to meet with our Bishop. His words were EXACTLY what I needed to hear. His kindness, and his loving concern were EXACTLY what I needed, and were miraculously spoken on the topic closest to my heart! At one point, I started crying, and I apologized for him having to meet with me- but I expressed gratitude- surely one of my friends had called him on my behalf and had told him of my problem, because everything he said spoke to my deep inner struggle! He looked confused for a moment, and then smiled- no one had called him, he simply followed his prompting, exactly when he felt the time was right, and the topics of discussion were what he felt impressed to say. AMAZING.

My heart is full, and my head clear. As beautiful as all of these helps have been, I do understand that none of these things could have happened without my willingness to try and work things out for myself. Knocking, and asking for Heavenly help, had to come from my desire for assistance and not from a desire to sit in my personal emotional puddle (don't get me wrong, I wanted to do that! I wanted to sit, tell the world about my issue, and complain until everyone felt sorry for me... but, where would that have gotten me?). To my children- please learn from this- you must knock!

What was most amazing about this experience was that the perfect words from my Bishop only came after I had decided to do what was right. The Bishop's holy words were Heavenly confirmation that I had done the right thing, and my faithfulness was rewarded with a beautiful blessing. And, my decision to do what was right only came after study and council. There was some beautiful work done here, and I am very thankful for it. I am thankful for my friends, who offered help when I needed it, and offered prayers on my behalf. I am thankful for my Bishop, and his wonderful use of his Priesthood and position. I am so thankful for Heavenly Father and our Savior, Jesus Christ- and the magnificent work they do in our lives each day!

** The movie was 17 Miracles and was totally amazing. It was a very humbling reminder that whatever struggle I am going through is pretty small compared to what many others have suffered. It was relevant to my personal struggle, so it spoke even louder to my heart- but it is definitely a movie I would suggest anyone see!

Family Home Evening

One of the thousands of things I adore about the LDS Church is Family Home Evening. Our Family Home Evening was extra special because we invited our local LDS Missionaries to come and join us! The Missionaries offered to come up with our activity. Boy, was it a fun one! We were ALL laughing and having a great time! The soundtrack to the evening was courtesy of Vocal Point from BYU. We had such a great time, and we all loved the lesson.

Each person in our group was given two cookies. Our task was to remove chocolate chips from within the cookies. We listened to Primary Songs that were performed by Vocal Point while we removed the chocolate chips to the beat of the songs. It was so much fun! Once each person was finished, there was a small pile of crumbs, and a small pile of chocolate chips. The missionaries asked all of us to count out ten chips. The kids loved it! When we each had ten chips, the missionaries asked us to take one tenth of the ten, and put it back in the bigger cookie pile. The kids had a great time trying to figure out the concept of "ten percent" and they did really well! Each one of us put our tenth back into the pile... and each of us still had a pile of chocolate! It was a beautiful way to demonstrate the idea of tithing.

I love tithing to my church. I SEE the tithing in action!!!

The Church explains, "One of the blessings of membership in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the privilege of paying tithing. This privilege is a double blessing. By paying tithing, Church members show their gratitude to God for their blessings and their resolve to trust in the Lord rather than in material things. They also help further the work of the Lord in the earth, blessing others of God’s children with the opportunity to learn of Him and to grow in the gospel.

Through the prophet Malachi, the Lord declared:

"Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the Lord of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it" (Malachi 3:10).

Church members give their tithing donations to local leaders. These local leaders transmit tithing funds directly to the headquarters of the Church, where a council determines specific ways to use the sacred funds. This council is comprised of the First Presidency, the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, and the Presiding Bishopric. Acting according to revelation, they make decisions as they are directed by the Lord. (See D&C 120:1.)

Tithing funds are always used for the Lord's purposes—to build and maintain temples and meetinghouses, to sustain missionary work, to educate Church members, and to carry on the work of the Lord throughout the world."

One chocolate chip to give back to the Lord. My children happily gave their one chip- and ate the other nine. What a super lesson!!!

The Goodness of God

It is not enough to just be good. We sin, and we need redemption from our sins. Jesus Christ offers it through the power of the atonement. My New Testament Study Guide explains, "Paul taught the Jewish Christians that having the outward signs of righteousness (such as circumcision) meant nothing if a spirit of faith and obedience did not dwell in them. The same is true today. Outward signs of righteousness (such as Church attendance) are not enough. A spirit of faith, love, and obedience must also dwell in our hearts."



We may live in momentary happiness, but only true joy can come from the freedom of repentance.

The Ministry of Motherhood

I am seriously adoring this summer book club from Good Morning Girls! I love that our daily scripture directly relates to the wonderful and uplifting book that we are reading! This scripture is perfection all by itself, but when paired with inspirational words about mothering and kindness, it really does warm the soul!

The book we are reading is called The Ministry of Motherhood: Following Christ's Example in Reaching the Hearts of our Children. The author beautifully discusses parenting in a unique and spiritual way. I am enjoying this book so much! As I read along with the Good Morning Girls I am feeling so blessed that this book has come into my home! Parts of this book have brought sweet tears to my eyes and have caused me to look at the scriptures more deeply. There are times when the author brings a scripture to life- adding details that may have been present, and painting a story for one to behold.

This book is not written by an LDS author, the author uses examples of Christ found in The Holy Bible. This book is beautiful and wonderful, and is non-denominational in its wordings. This is the PERFECT gift for any Christian mother! I love reading inspirational books- they strengthen my testimony about all scriptures, including The Book of Mormon. So many times I will read a beautiful scripture that is discussed in an inspirational Christian book, and I will recall a perfect companion scripture in The Book of Mormon, Doctrine and Covenants, or Pearl of Great Price! So many times have I felt warmed by a wonderful passage from The Holy Bible, and upon further research felt enlightened by the fulfillment of the Gospel found in these other holy texts. I feel so blessed to have my scriptures!

Catching Fish

Yes, it is a bit hammy to post pictures like these, but I am a big Lego fan (and so are my boys!) so I thought using them as a visual aid was appropriate.

The scripture John 21, is a very good read. When looking at the things Jesus was trying to teach, we see that there are many messages inside this chapter. Breaking down just a small portion of these we see a multitude of comforting blessings that can come from following Christ.

In the scripture, Jesus was standing on the shore while his disciples were fishing on the water. The disciples did not recognize The Savior. Jesus asked the disciples if they had caught fish. When the disciples answered no, Jesus suggested casting the net to the right side of the boat. Upon doing so, the disciples found a vast amount of fish. As the disciples pulled the net full of fish to shore, it was found, surprisingly, that the net that held the multitude of fish had not broken.

When Jesus gives us a task, he provides the way for us to complete it. Jesus understood the difficulty in finding food and resources, and he helped provide means. The Savior did not hand them fish, but simply suggested a different path in which to find the fish. In our lives, The Savior does not force us to walk His path, he simply and lovingly provided us an example to follow. His examples, and The Church that he put on this earth, are meant to help lead us safely back home. His atonement provides us forgiveness for our sins through the beautiful process of repentance and growth. Our Savior loves us- he wants us to eat and walk with Him =)

Sharing Faith

I am a private person. My faith has been so personal, and I don't ever want to step on any one's toes, or offend. Today's scripture is one that we hear often at Church.

Years ago our Church came out with Pass Along Cards. These wonderful little cards fit in pockets or purses, and are meant to be shared. Kurt and I are the only ones in either of our families that are members of our faith. So often we want to share our beliefs, but we were never sure of how to do it- especially when most of our family members live so far away. Last Christmas, we took a big step (for us) and we included some beautiful Pass Along Cards in our Christmas cards. It was our first step in sharing.

Last General Conference we heard a wonderful talk from President Uchtdorf, where he told listeners, "With so many social media resources and a multitude of more or less useful gadgets at our disposal, sharing the good news of the gospel is easier and the effects more far-reaching than ever before... My dear young friends, perhaps the Lord’s encouragement to “open [your] mouths” might today include “use your hands” to blog and text message the gospel to all the world! But please remember, all at the right time and at the right place. Brothers and sisters, with the blessings of modern technology, we can express gratitude and joy about God’s great plan for His children in a way that can be heard not only around our workplace but around the world. Sometimes a single phrase of testimony can set events in motion that affect someone’s life for eternity." (Waiting on the Road to Damascus, LDS General Conference April 2011)

Since President Uchtdorf's talk I have looked for ways to share my faith, at the appropriate time and place. I have found that my blog is a wonderful way to share my faith, especially as it will likely be shared with my grandchildren some day! I have used Facebook as a way to share faith as well, sending encouraging LDS messages or videos to friends that need uplifting, or quoting scriptures or leaders.

All of these are nice, I know, but the most important thing I can do is prepare my sons for their missions. By encouraging them in their hopes and plans for missions, I am really able to apply this scripture to my life. The best missionaries are the most faithful young men, and as I continue to grow spiritually, so will they.

I am so thankful for missionary work. My husband and I love our Church, and adore our leaders. We are thankful for the sacrifice that all missionaries make, and the little seeds of faith that they plant everywhere they go. We are so excited for the day that we will welcome home our sons from serving their own honorable missions, and celebrate their dedicated service!

Easter

There is something magical about Easter. To me, Easter is practically as exciting as Christmas. As the children have grown, we realize that we created small traditions without consiously doing so. While I wouldn't recommended this to my children (boys- careful planning with your spouse can only enhance a holiday for your family, and cut stress for your marriage) the early years of parenthood were so busy that we were forced to prioritize and only did what was most important to us, rather than allow a lot of holiday fluff to get in the way. Perhaps I don't mean that we created traditions, as much as we unconsciously did NOT buy into many of the mainstream American Easter traditions. We never did the "Easter Bunny" thing. Sure, the kids see tons of bunnies this time of year- be it in chocolate or stuffed form, but they do not understand the concept of the "Easter Bunny" entering our home and hiding baskets. Do they have baskets? Of course! However, it was never something that Kurt and I did for them, but rather something their Grandma Joyce enjoyed putting together (not going to lie- she outdoes herself every single year, and Kurt and I have just as much fun going through the piles of candy and toys that she lovingly nestles inside the fun baskets). The mall's Easter Bunny was never something our kids had to see because we didn't line up at the court and wait for pictures (Santa only gets pictures every other year) and we didn't color eggs. We didn't put on egg hunts, although many of the events we attended had them. To us- it is not about eggs and bunnies, it is about The Savior.

Because we were always short on time, we didn't really get to go crazy on Easter activities. Now that I am home with the boys, however, we find ourselves being invited to brunches, parties, egg hunts, and festivals. While this can be a good thing, we have found ourselves in a predicament. What should we do with our time? What is the best way to educate our kids about Easter?

With so many wonderful and creative options, it can be difficult to filter the things which would best benefit our family. For us, Easter has always included new clothes (a tradition carried down from my family), cute self-portraits of our family, baskets (which the kids know are from Grandma Joyce), and above all, Church. Now that I am home, and the boys are older, we will be adding a traditional Easter dinner- Kurt is thrilled, he loves ham.

To add to our holiday, I decided that our breakfasts will now include these on Easter morning. What a wonderful way to discuss The Savior! Take marshmallows, roll them in melted butter. Coat them with sugar and cinnamon. And fold them into crescent roll dough. Bake. What a great idea! The marshmallow represents Jesus. When he died, he was anointed with oil (butter) and spices (cinnamon and sugar), and laid to rest in a tomb (crescent roll dough). But Jesus overcame death, and was risen. So, when the crescent rolls are finished baking, and the children open them- they will see that Christ (the marshmallow representation) is gone! What a simple and sweet way to explain and demonstrate the miracle of The Resurrection. Yes, we will add that tradition =) Our family will make them together Easter morning. (Harrison and I will make, but not eat)

As our traditions evolve throughout our years, I am thankful that our priorities have stayed the same. Faith in God, our family, and our friendships are what matters most to us.

We hope that everyone has a wonderful Easter Sunday and can remember the real reason we have to celebrate- Jesus lives!

New Ward

Pictures of Carter and Harrison before going to Church. The last pic, is Harrison eating one of his favorite snacks- grapefruit!

One of the best things about being a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is that we always have a building, full of wonderful members, waiting for us when we move. We never have to "church shop" or wonder about different congregations and their opinions of scriptures, doctrine, or even morality.

Moving is always a little bit scary. Church is not. We have found that there are always friends waiting for us, and we are always welcomed! Sure, some wards are different than others, but that does not have to be seen as a bad thing. Our new ward has a tiny Primary, so our children don't have a lot of peers in their Sunday School classes. While we can look at this as a negative thing, we choose to look at it as a positive one- now our kids have smaller classes with more individualized scripture study and activity planning! Our new ward also contains many more empty-nester's than young families. While we can look at this with a frown, we choose to look at it as a wonderful tool for us to use- think of all of the amazing advice they can offer, all of the great stories, all of the enriching experiences that they can share! Just the years of happy marital tidbits alone is a treasure, I am sure! Think of the great tricks and ideas they have for us, while we raise our kids- because they have already done it!

I am so thankful for our Church. I love it. I am thankful for the way our Church is set up- we always have a building, and a meeting time, and we always go to Church with our closest neighbors. This is perfection!

Food Storage!

No, this is not a picture of my food storage... yet.

I don't believe it is mere coincidence that the very last can of tomatoes from our food storage was used on the very same day that Kurt started his new job. Nope, cant be.

"Our Heavenly Father created this beautiful earth, with all its abundance, for our benefit and use. His purpose is to provide for our needs as we walk in faith and obedience. He has lovingly commanded us to “prepare every needful thing” (see D&C 109:8) so that, should adversity come, we can care for ourselves and our neighbors and support bishops as they care for others. We encourage members world-wide to prepare for adversity in life by having a basic supply of food and water and some money in savings. We ask that you be wise as you store food and water and build your savings. Do not go to extremes; it is not prudent, for example, to go into debt to establish your food storage all at once. With careful planning, you can, over time, establish a home storage supply and a financial reserve."
—The First Presidency, All Is Safely Gathered In: Family Home Storage, Feb. 2007, 1


My mother always kept a very full pantry, something that she learned from her own mother- a bargain shopper who took advantage of every sale (having 6 kids made a big grocery bill!). My mother kept the tradition and always had a lot of food around. I tried to keep the practice in my own home, but it never worked for me. I didn't really focus on having "food storage" until my mid twenties, but by then I had no idea of how the heck to start. The idea of having ample food storage was overwhelming. Where would we keep it? How would we afford it? What the heck would we buy? Thoughts like this flooded my mind, and I found myself sitting at the back of Relief Society programs where food storage was the main topic, or just skipping them all together. I just felt too out of my element. While the other women were learning how to make "mock ground beef" using whole wheat and smiles I was looking around and wondering- where do we get whole wheat? What the heck do I make with it when I do get it? What do you mean I need a wheat grinder? Harrison and I cant eat wheat- NOW WHAT?!

I know this sounds silly- but it is something I lost sleep on. I looked at ready-made kits. I looked into canning. I looked into bulk. I looked into specialty companies, who (for a mere $6000) could provide me with what they said I needed. But after doing a lot of reading I learn that the body rejects foods that are unlike it has ever been fed, and many cases of malnourishment and starvation occurred when there WAS access to food, but it was food that the body was not willing to accept. Ugh. Bring on the headache. There are at least a dozen amazing sites that are willing to walk me through step by step food storage help- but NONE that seemed practical for what we needed. So, Kurt and I decided to take our complaints to the Bishop of our Ward (about... hm... 4 wards ago). At the time we were super young with super young kids. Our Bishop heard my thoughts, and laughed. He suggested that in order to start my own food storage, that I start slow. He asked that we add 2 items per grocery trip, to our storage. Just 2. We can pick the 2. We had no space in our small apartment, so he suggested taking the 2 items and putting them in a box under our bed. And this began our food storage.

Our food storage has never been huge, and never had whole wheat. Our food storage is things we use often, and things that we love. Our first try with using food storage was a semi disaster- but a step on our path of learning. We bought off-brand, on-sale cheap foods, that we normally wouldn't touch, but we thought would work in our storage. Kurt's company reorganized and we found ourselves using our food storage as our main grocery source. UGH. It was gross. Icky food plus depressing situation = NOT GOOD. We vowed to do better the next time. The next time we stuck to our boxing method, but because Kurt's income was so comfortable we didn't make food storage a priority. Kurt's company eliminated his position. This time, we had foods that were pretty much the same as we were used to, and I had even provided food storage treats. PERFECT!

Ever since then, I make sure to buy extras in the good quality products that we use, and always keep a few treats around. I know that by planning ahead, we are setting ourselves up for success in the event of an emergency, and at the very least, we are setting ourselves up to be able to help those in need at any given time.


So, today- as I used my last can of tomatoes. I was grateful. I was so grateful for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and the loving messages they provide. I was so thankful that my food storage helped us keep our grocery bills low while Kurt was home. I was so thankful for the wonderful family that I get to feed, and I was thankful for the comfort that having food storage provided.

Reading for Miracles

When I first heard that my dear friend, Becca, was doing a Book of Mormon reading challenge I was all in! I just thought it would be a great chance to track reading, have others reading with me, and for me to have someone there to hold me accountable for reading my scriptures every day. It was an excellent addition to my "to do" list (I have a weakness for lists- I love them!).

Becca started listing the participants of her challenge on her blog. The list got so long, and the entries of the readings were so detailed, she moved everything to a separate blog! Something that stood out to me was over the names of the people who had signed up, she had written something to the effect of, "Reading to see Miracles." That made me stop for a moment. I thought about it, and when I decided to link the info on my own blog, that is what I decided to tittle her challenge as. At the time, we had absolutely no worries or cares in the world. We had just moved, we were living in a beautiful home, we were surrounded by family- all healthy and happy.

What I didn't know was just how important seeing those miracles would be. What I didn't know was all of the challenges that would come for our family, like waves upon waves in a typhoon. What I didn't know was that through everything, although I would feel unsure, frightened of the future, and stressed about the situation- that because of this scripture reading, I would have a deeper feeling of peace than I have ever felt before. I would feel more comfort than I had in my life. I would grow closer to my Heavenly Father and my Savior than ever.

Heavenly Father always has a plan for us. I love Him. The Lord does not abandon us. He does not forget us. Yes, there have been times, during my darkest moments, that I felt alone and frightened, but every time that I ASKED for help, it was given. I hope that my children notice that I did not type: "every time I NEEDED help" - because that is not the same thing. When I was reading to see miracles, I saw that throughout the scriptures there were times of joy and times of sorrow. Times where things were pretty good, and times where things were pretty bad. The difference was in how the people ACTED. I read time after time of a humble servant of the Lord, doing all that he could to do the Lord's work, and then, after exhausting his own resources and energies, calling upon the Lord for help. In order to knock, we must show Him that we are willing to set aside our personal desires and allow him to carry us in a direction that will truly lead us to everlasting happiness. Sometimes our answers will take us to unexpected destinations, but time after time, with hard work, and faith- we are given situations that end up being better for us than we could have realized. Our time here on Earth is not a time to work to acquire stuff- it is a time to learn, share, and grow.

Becca has expressed desire to continue to read scriptures like this, and invited people to join her. Her faith, inspired actions, and her desire to help others find peace is so inspirational to me. Her story is so amazing- right now her family is experiencing its own real miracle, and I couldn't be happier for them! I am so extremely lucky to have gotten to know her!

I pray that the New Year brings a feeling of renewal and hope to our hearts. I pray that my children continue to grow in their love of their Savior and their Father in Heaven. I pray that we continue to remember who we are, and strive to return with honor when we are once again in the presence of our Father above. Things on Earth are not perfect, but the Lord and His teachings are. As 2011 greets us, I am going to keep my thoughts and actions centered around my theme word: Present. I will work harder to really be present- fully present- when dealing with my faith, family, and home. I am going to continue reading with Becca, and when I read I am going to be present in the reading, and absorb everything the Lord would have me see. I am going to be present with my family- and remember that it is the little moments that make memories: the candy-mouthed kisses, and sticky-handed hugs. I will be present with my husband, and I will work hard be the woman that completes him. I will strive to be more present in my life, so that my eyes are more open to opportunities to serve The Lord.

May the blessings of God be upon all of us, and may 2011 be a truly wonderful year =)

My wall.

There are so many sayings about walls. "I was backed into a wall!" "I should have seen it, the handwriting was on the wall." "That was off the wall." "The kids are driving me up the wall!" Lately I feel like I have my own personal pet wall- perhaps it is attached to my shadow, or maybe it hangs around me, like some kind of invisible cloud. Not sure... but it is there, and today I ran straight into it.

Christmas is a special time of year. I love Christmas. I start celebrating in July. No, really, I do. Ask my husband about my "Christmas in July!" holiday movie marathons, and the hours of Pandora Christmas music I will play while I bake a small turkey breast and buy cranberry jelly. Yeah, crazy I guess, but something about the holidays is so wonderful- I just want to soak it in! The holidays really start for me in October. I love Halloween and I work hard to make sure my kids have cute little costumes, there are a few decorations, and that I am well stocked with yummy candy. Things heat up for us in November, we put up at least one tree and start picking out cards. As the weather gets colder I get more cheery, I love snow. So, by the time December rolls around I am usually giddy and always smiling.... so, why do I have a pet wall?

Well, yeah, we have had some hardships, but through them I have kept my heart on the real reason for this amazing holiday, and I have been able to keep myself together. However, any "excitement" this year can really be credited to my children, something about seeing the discovery of holidays through the eyes of two 5 year olds, and one 4 year old, really make holidays shine! The kids were spooked on Halloween, were thankful on Thanksgiving, and are now joyful at Christmas. They love all of it- from Christ to Santa they want to take it all in. I am grateful for that. However, I should have realized that just as no man can live by another man's faith in God, I could not get by with just my children's excitment in Christmas. No, it wasn't enough. Insert wall.

My husband is still sick. I have been cleaning, taking care of the kids, making the meals, doing the shopping, and doing all the Christmas stuff (baking, shopping, wrapping, projects) by myself. At first I know my list looks small, and I know that compared to other families my list is tiny, but to me, it is huge. I was a career student just 4 months ago, being home again is new to me. Within just a month of being home, we added my brother and his son to the family. I am not used to taking care of 6 people- it is hard! Anyway...

Today, I ran into my wall. I ran into my limit. I ran into the worst within myself. There is only so much cleaning, cooking, and childcare I can do... and after weeks and weeks without a break (or help!) I lost it. We always have dinner at 5:00pm. Always...

Somehow today, I overestimated how much I could accomplish around the house. I glanced at the clock, half way though a project, and saw that dinner was already late. It was just after 5! Dinner hadn't even been started!!! I tried to calm myself by coming up with a fast dinner option. Wait... the table was COVERED in half decorated cookies drying on parchment paper. Great... where would the kids eat? I cant have them eating spaghetti on the microfiber couch! UGH. The kids started screaming. My husband's snoring (he was in bed most of the day) and coughing, echoed through the house. My brother was napping too. I lost it.

I went into the living room. It was dark. The only lights were from the dim glow of the Christmas bulbs outside, and from the tiny tree on my desk. I cried. I cried hard. I couldn't help but pray. I felt forgotten. I poured my heart out to God, and I begged for help: I am out of options. I don't know who our Visiting Teachers or Home Teachers are. My husband cant help, he is sick. My brother cant help, he is depressed- and he, too, is pushed to his limit. I cried and I cried. I just need some help. I just need to feed my family!

With tears streaming down my face, the doorbell rang. Great. I had decided not to answer (after all, I was in a dark room, so maybe whoever it was would just assume we weren't home). The kids had other plans. Sean raced from the back of the house to the door, and before I could protest, he was working with the lock. Ugh. Well, awesome. Whoever is at the door knows we are home. I wiped the tears, comforting myself that we never have company over, so it is probably just a salesman. My heart fell when I saw it was my LDS neighbor. This is not how I want to be seen.

She saw me- dirty clothes, unwashed hair, no makeup, teary eyed, in a dim room. Kids who were still in PJ's, hair messy, candy cane smudges on their faces. She didn't judge me. She didn't ask questions. She simply smiled at me, and explained that she was supposed to have Missionaries over to her home for dinner, but due to illness they were unable to make it. She hoped that our family would come and join her and her husband- there was no way they would be able to eat the 4lb roast she had made. I stared in disbelief. I started to tear. She probably thought I was crazy, but she didn't say a word. I apologized for the state of myself and the children (for those who know us, you know the kids and I are usually "put together"). She waved her hand and laughed, she explained that we could just come in pajamas- it wouldn't bother her at all. Her warmth was overwhelming. I told her we would be there in 15 minutes.

When I closed the door, and the kids ran off, I was overcome. There are no words. In my time of need, I had my very own Christmas miracle. When I had hit my wall. When I felt like I couldn't do a single thing more for another person. When I had literally given all that I could- I knocked, and I was sent help. I was literally instantly helped. I cried more. But this time, I was crying with gratitude for such a fast response, from someone who obviously had been open to a prompting.

I got the kids dressed, and went to the bathroom to wash my face and do a little make up. I had been so amazed by such a fast dinner invitation that I didn't stop and think about what was going to be served, and I found myself rehearsing explanations as to why Harrison and I wouldn't be eating some of the things in the meal- not being able to eat gluten can appear to be rude, and the LAST thing I ever want to do is insult my hosts! My small etiquette worry was gone as soon as I arrived. Dinner was gluten-free. My neighbor has a gluten allergy and his wife makes gluten-free meals.............. amazing.......... like.......... wow.

Really. No words. I have no words. I have only awe.

"Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you" Matthew 7:7

I am so thankful for my neighbors. I am so thankful for their willingness to be instruments in the hands of God. I am so thankful for my Heavenly Father for demonstrating his love for me, yet again, in such a very profound way. I am so thankful for this day, because even though it was one of the worst beginnings, it was the best end. No matter what happens, I know Heavenly Father is there for me, and I am so grateful for that. I am so thankful for the chance I had to have dinner with my wonderful neighbors- the food was great, the conversation was delightful, and I am renewed!

The Savior said, “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28). My soul feels rest. I feel peace. I feel the joy, and the miracle, that is Christmas. I am so comforted to now know, that yes- I do have a pet wall... but that wall, has a door, and all I need to do is knock.

Seeing the light in the darkness.

Inspiring

Serene

Reverent

Perfect

And now...

Destroyed.

There has been heartache in Provo, Utah over the recent fire that engulfed the Provo Tabernacle. The Tabernacle was a beautiful and historic building, not only for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, but also for the state of Utah. This tragic event has made me do a lot of reflecting, especially when this came at such a sacred time of year.

With so much going on in the world: environmental issues, political problems, economic troubles, and rampant immorality, we were always thankful for the peace in our home. Sure, our home had its ups and downs, but on a whole our little family felt safe, sheltered, secure. Our home and family felt like the Provo Tabernacle. The Spirit of the Lord was present. We were humble, thankful, reverent, and giving. And then... just as the fate of the gorgeous Tabernacle... all was lost.

Brian's wife took off. Grandpa got cancer. Kurt lost his job. The house is up for short-sale, and we pray daily the bank doesn't foreclose. There has been rampant illness affecting everyone in the home, repeatedly. No health insurance. Water-heater broke today, needs a repairman. What happens if we get evicted? Where will we go- with no income? How could this happen? We did everything right... we just wanted to come and help... we prayed about everything... why is this happening?... what will we do?

Yes. I can see parallels in our life and the Tabernacle. Sure, the Tabernacle had a few paint chips, there were a few loose screws, it took daily maintenance and upkeep- just like our home and family. But there is something about Church buildings. Something about our favorite places. Something about them makes me feel like they are immune. Naive, I know. But something in me always thought, "They are buildings dedicated to God's work- they serve righteous purposes, therefore, no harm can come to them!" Yes. Naive. This same naivete applied to my family. Our family works hard. We are trying to do God's work. We try tirelessly to give to our neighbors. We sacrifice for the betterment of our family. We pray. We are so thankful. We put our family first. We are honest. We are faithful. I thought we would be immune from severe hardships. Yes, totally naive, I know- but I thought that some things, like, my husband's job- would be safe. Our lives feel like they are crumbling all around us. And the thickness of our tribulations grows and is slowly suffocating the light that once radiated from our hearts. We ache, and then feel guilty that we are not more faithful, so then we fester in our guilt, which is pretty depressing. We seek comfort, through scriptures, and inspiration through meditation and prayer. But as each day passes, our light grows dimmer.

Yes, when I first saw pictures of that beautiful Tabernacle on fire, I thought, "Great. Nothing is sacred. Nothing is safe." And I was almost numb. That amazing piece of history gone- so quickly- and nothing anyone could do to stop the destruction. It felt like it paralleled my life.

And then..... I saw this.

Amazing. This was taken from a portion of the building that was completely burned... and yet, there He is. Our Savior. Perfect. Strong. Brilliant. Welcoming.

This picture (to take the term someone else had used) is both unbelievable, and totally believable at the same time.

So often during times of very serious turmoil it is difficult to be able to seek out our blessings- jobless, almost homeless, with illness affecting everyone- it is SO hard to find Christ. But, I am so thankful. I am so thankful that we had already had him preserved in our hearts and minds, so that during these fires in our lives, we can see that He is real, and that He is in control. And yes, it is alright for us to mourn the loss of our stability and security. It is alright for us to feel sad. It is alright for us to want a job and home again! I just need to remember, that even though the way is difficult, He is here.

I am thankful for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I am thankful for my husband, and my children. I am thankful for my health. I am thankful for my brother, and his wonderful son. I am thankful for my parents! I have so many things to be thankful for, and I have had SO MANY amazing experiences where I have witness the hand of The Lord in my life- I KNOW he is here with us, I just need to look a little bit deeper in my heart, and I need to remember that He has a plan.

The Temple

Reno Nevada Temple

I love this picture. This picture says at least 1000 words. I love that the Temple is above the lights and chaos that is the rest of the world, because the Temple is truly not a place of the world. Today I was supposed to post about something that makes me happy- the Temple and its blessings make me happy. I love the Temple. I love that there are so many different Temples, and yet, they are all the same. I am so thankful for the Temple!!!!!

To learn more about my beliefs on Temples and Temple Worship, click here- There are really neat pictures, and explanations on Temples!

Kurt

Kurt is such a champ! Here are some of my favorite things about him:

1) He works really hard at everything he does.

Example: He worked for 8... that is right, 8 hours on Carter's Toy Story 3 Lego train. Why? Because little Carter had asked him to. Kurt went the distance by looking through tubs and tubs of Legos for each piece and putting the whole thing together. FATHER OF THE YEAR!

2) He knows where to find inspiration, and reminds me through his example.

Example: When things are hard, and life gives us trials, he uses scriptures to help remind him that "this too shall pass." Currently he has some Church materials hanging above his computer- to remind him of what is REALLY important in life, and what his long-term goals are.

3) He can do anything!

Example: He really can do anything he puts his mind to! It is amazing! He can do yoga poses that take YEARS to accomplish, in just a few weeks. He can teach himself to play instruments, he can sing, he can dance, he can walk on his hands. He can do anything!

4) He is strong!

Example: He is so strong! He went to my parents' house and installed their new TV for them! He was able to lift their old one all by himself- SO STRONG! He did "Scale Pose" on the first try! Not only is he physically strong, but he is also spiritually strong, emotionally strong, and has a strong immune system!

5) He is funny- sooooo funny!

Example: I apologize, because this will be an inside joke for us. Kurt, remember, "That is one messed up donkey!" LOL!

6) He is handsome. SO hot. Can't stop looking at him. SO hot.

7) He is fast.

Example: He can outrun almost any high school track star... even today! FAST. I love that he is fast, because the kids are safer when he is around. Like... for example... if we are ever at a store, playground, or park, and someone was to pick up one of our kids and run- I KNOW that even if that person was fast, Kurt is faster. (Esp. if the stranger is trying to carry one of my kids- they are heavy!) And I have no doubt that Kurt would take that guy down and win that fight. I can count on him to protect our family. The only times where his speed is an issue is when I ask him to go jogging with me... he complains that I am too slow, lol.

8) He likes cool stuff.

Example: Computers, Star Wars, gaming systems, lights, stop-action films... I could go on and on. Kurt is NEVER bored- EVER. If he lacks entertainment, he makes his own!

9) We are completely different in a lot of ways, and it makes for good conversation.

Example: With so many years between us- we grew up very differently. Little things, like what TV shows were popular, or what music was our favorite growing up, are very different for us, so we always have something to talk about! It is nice! Another big difference was our upbringing. Kurt grew up on a farm in a tiny town in Iowa. He had chores, he worked a job, drove a tractor, played sports, tended to animals, built things, did 4H, and visited landmarks all over the United States! I grew up quite differently.

10) We see eye to eye on about 99% of things.

Example: NO- we were NOT born with this ability- communication was key and took us years to work on! At the end of the day, we agree on most things- we may not have started out agreeing on them, but at the end of the day- we agree. I attribute much of this to our agreement on our separate roles in our family. Kurt trusts me with knowing what is best for the children, and he supports decisions that I make for them. I trust him to preside, provide, and protect our family. This trust was not given in one day, or even over a few years... actually Kurt and my trust for one another in these rolls increased during our hardest times, because it would have been easier for one of us to bail instead of sticking it out. We can now trust that we really do have our priorities in line- and our family does come first- for both of us. Yes, I may make the final decisions on things pertaining to the kids, and he may make them on things that have to do with the family, but never before consulting one another- we respect each other's opinions.

11) I never get sick of him. EVER.

I cant even count how many times I have jokingly told him to just win a lottery of some kind (its a joke, because we don't gamble, lol) and stay home with me all the time!

12) I get to share my hut with him!

Back in Salt Lake, Elder David A Bednar explained that our families in Heaven are not our current nuclear families here on Earth- our families are MUCH bigger than that! He said that for some reason, people often picture Heaven like a hut. A small hut. And inside this hut is their spouse and their children, all still small. But that isn't how it works. Children will not be small children in Heaven. No. He explained that there are no family huts... but if we DO think of Heaven as a hut- to remember that the only one we would share the hut with, would be our spouse. Our spouses are the most important people on Earth! Through reading the scriptures, I have been reminded that all of my possessions and talents are gifts from God and I am able to have and use them here on Earth, to help my fellow man. At the end of my time here on Earth, when I depart, the only thing I get to take with me is Kurt. Yes, I am sealed to my children, but they will find spouses of their own, and children of their own too! The number one thing I get to have, and keep for all of eternity is Kurt. And I am so thankful, every single day, that I chose him and that we stayed together through so much.

I love you, Kurt =)

Happy Thanksgiving!

Today was a WONDERFUL day! It was the first time that I made a whole turkey, and it turned out beautifully! We made all the traditional side dishes, and I was thankful for Sean's mom, Abi, to come over and help! It was such a great time- all the elements of dinner ended up being perfectly timed, and we enjoyed every bite! I am especially thankful for Kurt, who did the dishes =) (and thank you to FlyLady for teaching me how to do the "cooking dishes" while I was cooking- so that there weren't too many dishes to do!

The kids had such a fun day- they made turkey crafts, helped make butter (yes- actual butter!), and played games! The boys had a Wii Sports Resort Bowling Tournament- what a good time =) Carter won, of course (he is obsessed with bowling!). The boys then decided to do Mario Kart Wii races- lol, so fun! Abi joined in on the fun too!

As we were sitting down to dinner, we asked each family member to either talk about things they are thankful for, or to offer a prayer of thanksgiving. It was really sweet that every single child wanted to offer a prayer- it was delightful to hear the things they are thankful for! Kurt offered our dinner prayer, and Abi and I talked about things we were thankful for.

Today was such a special day, and I am so thankful for the family that I got to share it with. I am thankful for the full bellies we all have, and for the fact that we live in a nation that has food available for its citizens. I am thankful for the kitchen. I am thankful for the dishes. I am thankful for the beautiful home in which we live. I am thankful for my children. I am so thankful for my eternal companion. I am thankful for my Church, and the restored Gospel. I am thankful for my parents. I am thankful for my little brother. I am thankful for my big sister. I am thankful for my kitty cat. I am thankful for my life!

I hope everyone had a blessed Thanksgiving. If we could all have more gratitude in our hearts, I know that the world would be a better place =)

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

I help the kids make paper-plate turkeys.

Kids love crafts!

Carter shows us his turkey and tells us all about it!

Harrison shows us his turkey.

Sean shows us his turkey!

The kids made butter! (Okay... actually Kurt did 99% of the work). Kurt shows us the butter, and the "un-butter." LOL

Our Thanksgiving Group! Kurt, Harrison, Mellissa, Carter, Abi, and Sean! HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Dinner is done! (oops, forgot to put out the green bean casserole before pic taken!) Don't worry, the bread and gravy were gluten free =p

My Norman Rockwell shot =p

Harrison put the turkey timer in his roll... just to be sure the roll was done. LOL

Carter tells us about his "full belly!"

Abi taught the boys to make these turkeys from our handprints! There is a turkey for everyone in our family! (Sorry Brian, your turkey isnt made from your hand, but we used another hand and are pretending it is yours! Poor Brian had to work today. BOO!)

Boys play Wii Bowling!

Abi and the boys play Mario Kart!